Save the Owls!…and Learn to Write Fun MG Novels Better? - Hoot by Carl Hiaasen

What is it about middle grade books — specifically the adventure-mystery ones — that are so much fun to read?

Perhaps I’m a bit nostalgic, but I’ve always seen this period of life as one brimming with potential — you’re old enough to start being a little independent, but not old enough yet to be saddled with adult burdens.

There’s still the innocence of childhood mixed with the curiosity and adventurousness of adolescence, the hope for an interesting and exciting future life, so many doors of possibility open to children of this age.

There’s nothing quite like it.

And when a great writer — one who understands the hopeful potentiality of this age group and has a wild imagination and kooky sense of humor — chooses to write for middle graders, the result can be something that all ages can enjoy.

At least, that’s what I’ve found.

Which is why I’ve been re-reading and analyzing several of my favorite middle grade books for these book analyses.

I don’t know whether or not I’ll ever end up writing middle grade adventure-mysteries myself one day, but the lessons all writers can learn from a skilled middle grade writer can be applicable to far more than just middle grade or adventures or mysteries.

From the tight pacing, to the humorous dialogue to the plot structuring, there’s a lot to absorb from looking at one of my favorite Carl Hiaasen middle grade adventure novels.

This story is about a boy who gets roped into a quest to save local owls — alongside a cast of quirky secondary characters: ranging from an over-ambitious cop to a grumpy construction lot foreman, to an elusive, bare-footed running boy and his bike-tire-chomping older stepsister…

Check it out!

Who this book is for: Middle grade readers and writers who would like to write for the middle grade and learn how to write quirky humor.

Scylighter rating: 5/6 ⭐s (explanation of ratings at the end)

Join our merry band of Brilliant Writers for more book dives like this!

BOOK NOTES

Chapter 1

In This Chapter

• Roy Eberhardt sees a mysterious running boy.
• Officer Delinko investigates a mysterious and clever vandalism.

The story begins with Roy being bullied by Dana Matherson on the school bus on the way to Trace Middle school.

It’s a Monday, and Roy is having his face mashed against the window. That’s when he sees the “strange boy…straw-blond and wiry…skin nut-brown from the sun” who is running barefoot on the sidewalk.

Roy sees the boy cut across a private yard, running extremely fast, faster than Roy’s best friend Richard from Montana. Dana calls Roy “cowgirl” and “Tex.”

(Within a couple pages, Hiaasen sets up key background information skillfully — Roy is a middle schooler who has moved from Montana, is being bullied by a bruiser named Dana who gives him a couple insulting nicknames — one of which will be used later — and he spots a key secondary character in the story, setting up this middle grade mystery.)

 —

Then we switch to another scene, where Officer David Delinko is sent to a future site of “another Mother Paula’s All-American Pancake House,” a vacant lot on the eastern edge of town.

Delinko meets up with a bald man named Curly Branitt, who is “cranky and unsmiling.” Curly is reporting vandalism — someone has pulled up the survey stakes, thrown them everywhere, and filled the holes. This will delay the clearing and grading needed to start building the pancake house.

Unfortunately, there’s no monetary damage, the vandals have only upset the construction schedule, which will cost money.

Officer Delinko isn’t sure what to do with this info, and as he walks away to consider, he stumbles over a hole and Curly mutters: “stupid owls.”

Officer Delinko decides to write up the incident as “trespassing and malicious mischief,” not vandalism, and Curly is satisfied.

Then Officer Delinko asks Curly what will happen to the owls once they start bulldozing. “What owls?” Curly chuckles.

(It’s really interesting that the answer to the mystery is introduced right in the second scene, in the first chapter, but readers won’t make the connection until much later in the story. And the casual corruption of the foreman who knows there are owls and doesn’t care about their fate is a really solid conflict that not just middle graders but adults can understand, and root against).

 —

Back to Roy.

During school, he keeps an eye out hoping to see the running boy, and at lunch he eats alone, thinking about what it would take to run in Florida’s muggy heat and humidity, comparing and contrasting that with Montana’s craggy mountains.

(The way Hiaasen has Roy describe in his head what his old home state was like compared to Florida sets up the main character’s need, without being overtly obvious about it — it’s clear that Roy is suffering from some homesickness. 

(He misses his friends and old home, and isn’t yet adjusting to the weather and society in Florida. This is emphasized by the fact that the first time we see Roy, he’s being bullied, and the next time he’s sitting alone eating lunch until…)

A boy named Garrett sits down across from Roy and they nod to each other.

The narrative states that as Roy is the new kid, he always sits alone at the end of the table. He’s a pro at being a new kid —T race Middle is his sixth school and Coconut Cove is the 10th town his family has lived in, because his dad works for the government.

What position he has, the book doesn’t say, but hints that his dad is “frequently promoted.”

Garrett chats with Roy, asking if he has a skateboard. Roy replies that he has a snowboard instead, and Garrett says he should learn to skateboard, inviting Roy to join him and his friends at the malls. Roy isn’t excited about malls, but he appreciates Garrett’s attempt to be friendly.

Garrett, it turns out, is a likable D-student who “goofed around in class and made farting noises whenever a teacher called him out.” And “his most famous trick was farting out the first line of the Pledge of Allegiance during homeroom.”

(Haha, this is such a middle school boy book.)

Roy takes the opportunity to ask Garrett if there are other schools in the area, and tells him about the running boy, but Garrett says other than a Catholic school a long ways off, Trace is the only option in this area.

There’s also a high school, but Roy is certain the boy is not big enough for high school.

Garrett is skeptical, thinking the boy must be a midget high schooler who just skipped school, but Roy points out that no kid skips school alone.

Roy wonders if the boy is an outlaw, Garrett laughs at his imagination, and the chapter ends.

(Ironically, we will find that the boy kind of is an outlaw, in more ways than one).

Comments & Analysis

Opening: Roy would not have noticed the strange boy if it weren’t for Dana Matherson, because Roy ordinarily didn’t look out the window of the school bus.

Closing: Garrett laughed again. “An outlaw — that’s rich, Eberhardt. You got a seriously whacked imagination.” // “Yeah,” said Roy, but already he was thinking about a plan. He was determined to find the running boy.

PROMISES & PAYOFFS

• We will find out who the running boy is.
• We will find out who the vandal is and why they’re vandalizing.
• Roy and Delinko’s stories will intersect.

OTHER COMMENTS

• Dana is an interesting name for the bully. It’s more often used as a girl’s name, which is a contrast with Dana as a character in this story, who is a big, tough, cigarette-smoking juvenile delinquent-type.
• It’s a decent opening, introduces a little mystery in the form of “who is the running boy” as well as some conflict, with the bully Dana literally shoving Roy’s face into the window. Enough to keep a kid reading.

Chapter 2

In This Chapter

• Roy keeps an eye out for the mysterious running boy, but gets injured while trying to follow him.
• We learn about Roy’s history and his character arc “need.”
• Roy is punished for hitting back (literally) at his bully.
• Roy makes a new enemy.

Roy decides to sit closer to the door the next morning on the bus, and when he reaches the place where he last saw the running boy, he keeps an eye out, but sees no one.

The next couple days, Roy does the same, but still nothing. Then on Friday, as he’s sitting near the door, he sees the running boy again.

The bus comes to a stop and Roy starts to get off when again Dana the bully grabs him by the neck. Roy does the only thing he can think of, blindly punches behind him and Dana releases him with a “gargled cry.”

As Roy barrels out the door, a “tall girl with curly blond hair and red-framed eyeglasses” is coming up. She demands to know where he’s going, and the bus drive yells “wait!” at Roy as well, but it’s too late. Roy is out and chasing the running boy.

Roy follows for several blocks, and realizes that the boy is an amazing runner, they end up on a golf course, and he sees the boy cut to the right into some pine woods.

But Roy hears yelling, turns his head, and has no time to duck when a golf ball hits him square above the left ear and falls facedown in the sand trap.

 —

The next scene begins with Roy thinking to himself that the “cowgirl” nickname Dana gave him was “his own fault,” because he’d claimed Montana as his home state.

He remembers how of all the places he lived, he loved Montana the most and when his parents said they were moving to Florida, he cried and tried to run away from home.

His parents assured him he would love Florida and moved, anyway, and at school when asked where he was from, he said Montana, which made Dana give him the nicknames: Tex, cowgirl, Roy Rogers-hardt.

After this reflection, we’re drawn into the action, which involves Roy sitting in Vice Principal Viola Hennepin’s office, being asked why he’d punched Dana Matherson.

“Because he was choking me to death,” Roy says, but of course Dana didn’t give that story, and no one else on the bus was willing to tell the truth because Dana scared them too. Roy gives a bit of attitude as he’s being questioned, and the vice principal doesn’t appreciate that.

She asks why he ran away, and Roy is distracted by her “single jet-black hair sprouting above her upper lip,” but answers the question

(These small details make the story feel more realistic, and also add to Roy’s characterization. He’s not just a poor sniffly boy who is homesick, he also has spunk, and is highly observant)

Miss Hennepin checks out the giant bruise Roy got from the golf ball, and then turns down the collar of his shirt.

“Her chilly gray eyes narrowed and her waxy lips pursed in consternation.

‘Hmm,’ she said, peering like a buzzard.”

“What is it?” Roy asks, but she just sends him back to class without suspending him from school, but his punishment will be that he is suspended from the bus for two weeks. And he has to write a apology letter.

Roy finds this an excellent punishment. No bus means no Dana.

And the letter is doable as well, although Roy points out: “who’s going to help him read it?”

“Don’t push your luck, Mr. Eberhardt,” Miss Hennepin says.

(This is where the Roy Rogers-hardt nickname from above makes sense. Because Roy’s last name is Eberhardt, which we learn in a very natural way during this dialogue between Roy and Miss Hennepin. It’s neat how Hiaasen gives the info readers need to know in a bit backwards order, but close enough together that it all makes sense).

Roy heads to the bathroom and pulls down his shirt collar in front of the mirror to see what Miss Hennepin was looking at. There, on his neck, are “four finger-sized bruises.”

“Thank you, dumb-butt Dana, he thought. Now Miss Hennepin knows I’m telling the truth.

“Well, most of the truth.”

—

 Next. Roy heads to lunch and scarfs down his chili burger and milk. Just as he’s about to throw away his “overbaked chocolate chip cookie the size of a hockey puck and just about as tasty” and leave, a hand “land[s] forcefully on his shoulder.”

(I like the inclusion of the cafeteria food descriptors here, not just because it helps build up the sense of the world of the story, but also because the comparison to a hockey puck is another reminder of the world Roy came from, the home he misses in Montana, which is his main struggle as a character. It sets up the beginning of his character arc well)

It’s not Dana. It’s the tall blond girl he’d run past on the school bus, and she looks mad.

“You nearly knocked me down this morning,” she says. “Why were you running?”

Roy explains that he punched a guy in the nose, but the girl knows that’s not why he was running. “You were chasing somebody, weren’t you?” she asks, and surprised, Roy asks her if she saw the shoeless running boy, too.

The girl pins Roy to the wall with his lunch tray and snarls, “mind your own business.”

Roy isn’t particularly intimidated, however, he is too curious: “Who is he?” he asks, but the girl doesn’t answer, and walks off.

Comments & Analysis

Opening: The next morning, Roy traded seats on the school bus to be closer to the front door.

Closing: “Wait!” Roy called after her. “Who is he?” // But the curly-haired girl didn’t answer of even look back. Stalking off, she simply raised her right arm and reproachfully wagged a forefinger in the air.

OTHER COMMENTS

• Chapter 2 does a good job of raising the stakes for both the mystery and the conflict introduced in chapter 1. Mystery-wise, Roy chases after the running boy, but doesn’t get very far. He’s taken out in a Hiaasen’s characteristically funny manner.
• Regarding the conflict with the bullies: Roy stands up to Dana, but in excellent story-telling fashion, it only makes things worse for him. PLUS, he’s picked up a new potential bully — a tough girl who goes out of her way to intimidate him, which also introduces a second mystery: who is she and what’s she got against Roy?

Chapter 3

In This Chapter

• Officer Delinko discovers alligators in the porta-potties at the construction site.
• Roy interacts with his parents and writes an apology letter that he’s required to give Dana.
• Delinko is assigned to patrol the Mother Paula construction site.

Officer Delinko is back with Curly observing again that the survey stakes have been methodically removed and the holes filled in. This time, Curly says, there’s actual vandalism to report — four tires on a flatbed truck are all flat.

But when Delinko checks, the tires aren’t slashed. The air has simply been let out of them.

Delinko spots three portable latrines on the truck and asks if Curly checked them. “What for?” Curly frowns.

“You never know,” Delinko says, and asks to have a look. Everything looks fine, at first, and then Delinko hears a muffled splash. Looking down with a flashlight, he yelps and runs out. Someone has put alligators in the porta-potties.

Curly was flabbergasted. “Are they…big gators?”

Officer Delinko shrugged, nodding toward the Travelin’ Johnnys. “I imagine all of ’em look big,” he said, “when they’re swimming under your butt.”

 —

Switch to Roy.

Back home, Roy’s mother has been notified by Miss Hennepin about the incident, and both parents question Roy when he comes back.

Roy lets them think that he got hit by the golf ball because he was afraid after hitting Dana, because he’s too tired to tell them the full story.

Roy’s mom tells them that Dana apparently has a broken nose. But Roy’s dad doesn’t seem bothered. In fact, he looks a bit proud.

When Roy shows them the finger marks on his neck, his dad gets serious, asking what happened to the other boy and was he disciplined. Roy’s dad asks for the boy’s name.

Roy is a little hesitant, knowing his dad works for the Department of Justice, but his mom tells his dad the name. His parents decide to call the school tomorrow to see how Dana will be disciplined, and Roy regrets showing them the fingermarks on his neck, he just wants to let the whole thing go, but they’re not having it.

 —

The next scene begins with a description of Roy’s room, with its poster of a cowboy rodeo and a flyer from Yellowstone National Park (Note: located in Wyoming, and part of Montana and Idaho).

Roy’s dream is to return to Montana when he’s old enough and become a cowboy, maybe.

Roy gets out notebook paper and writes his apology letter:

“Dear Dana,

“I’m sorry I busted your nose. I hope the bleeding has stopped. I promise not to hit you ever again as long as you don’t bother me on the bus. I think that’s a fair arangement.” [sic]

Then Roy shows the letter to his parents. His mom thinks the tone might be a bit forceful, but his dad says the tone is just right.

 —

A police captain (unnamed) slumps at his desk, thinking about how he’d moved to Florida after two decades “pounding the streets of Boston,” hoping his new home would be a “sleepy little village.” That turned out not to be the case — the place was “growing like a weed — too much traffic, too many tourists, and yes, even crime.”

(This is also a great key to the mystery and what the problem really is.)

Officer Delinko comes in and tells him about the alligators in the porta-potty.

The captain is only involved in this case because the pancake franchise “had some clout with local politicians.” The captain and Delinko talk about who might be doing this, and the captain thinks it’s juvenile delinquents, but Delinko thinks it might be more than that. He thinks “somebody’s got it in for Mother Paula.”

The captain is skeptical, and orders Delinko to send a patrol car by the construction site every hour to either catch the vandals or scare them away.

Delinko asks to patrol the site himself, and is refused because the overtime budget is “tapped out.” But Delinko doesn’t care about the overtime, he just wants to solve the mystery.

(As do we readers! Even though Roy is the true main character, Delinko makes a great secondary character)

Comments & Analysis

Opening: Officer Delinko shielded his eyes against hte noon glare. // “Took you long enough,” said Curly, the construction foreman.

Closing: “Oh, I don’t want any overtime,” the patrolman said. All he wanted was to solve the mystery.

OTHER COMMENTS

• Even when not a whole lot of exciting stuff is happening in a story, humor can go a long way in keeping people interested. And Hiaasen’s great with humor in this book, what with the alligators in the porta-potty and the mild bickering that Roy’s parents have over the tone of his apology letter — not to mention the apology letter itself.
• It’s not necessarily laugh-out-loud funny, like some of the later events in this book, but it’s enough to induce a smile and a page turn. And that’s all you need, sometimes.

Chapter 4

In This Chapter

• Roy finds out the girl who threatened him is Beatrice Leep, soccer star.
• Delinko is pranked when his car windows are painted overnight.
• Roy confronts Beatrice in the cafeteria and Dana at home.

On Monday when Roy goes back to school, he’s nervous about running into Dana, but finds that Dana isn’t there. Garrett tells him:

“[Dana] called in sick…Dude, what’d you do to that poor guy? I heard there was guts all over the bus.”

When Roy says that’s not true, Garrett continues: “I heard you pounded him so hard, his nose got knocked up to his forehead. I heard he’ll need plastic surgery to put it back where it belongs.”

This makes Roy roll his eyes, and Garrett informs him that everyone thinks he’s a tough guy because no one else has punched a Matherson before. Apparently Dana has three older brothers “none of whom was remembered fondly at Trace Middle.”

Then Roy asks Garrett a favor, and asks about the tall girl with curly blond hair and red glasses.

“You got the hots for Beatrice Leep?” Garrett asks. Roy is surprised that anyone would name their kid Beatrice, and asks what Garrett knows about her.

She’s a soccer jock with a bad attitude, Garrett says, so stay out of her way.

“I don’t even know her!” Roy protests, saying that for some reason Beatrice is mad at him, and he doesn’t know why.

Garrett groans at that. “First Dana Matherson, now Beatrice the Bear. You got a death wish, Tex?” he asks.

Then Garrett tells Roy that once, Beatrice was harrassed by a high school star linebacker. She chased down the guy and threw him into the fountain, braking his collarbone in three places.

“Maybe you ought to think about Catholic school,” Garrett says.

“Too bad we’re Methodists,” Roy says.

“Then convert, dude. Seriously.”

(That’s a hilarious exchange. And also a bit nostalgic…even though it’s used as a joke and it’s not a serious key point in the story, it’s been a while since I’ve seen a children’s book that treats church like just a normal part of the social fabric. That’s not always the case, nowadays, to most people’s detriment.)

 —

Officer Delinko gets out to the construction site early, looking forward to doing some sleuthing because his job has gotten somewhat boring. He thinks that if he catches the vandal, it will be a “feather in his cap” and “possibly the first step toward a promotion.”

So at 5am, he heads out to the site. It’s still dark, and he parks the car and waits for the sun to rise. Looking through the windshield in his car lights, he sees some tiny burrowing owls.

Delinko dozes off and wakes up to the sound of the dispatcher asking his location. The car feels hot but looks darker than usual. Just then, something smacks the car.

Delinko struggles to unstrap his seat belt as his door flies open and sunlight streams in.

It’s Curly, standing outside, and when he asks what’s going on, Curly tells him to see for himself — it’s 9:30 in the morning, and the windows of his car are spray-painted black and dry.

Also, Curly shows Delinko that the stakes have once again been pulled up.

 —

Roy decides he can’t spend the year hiding from Dana and Beatrice. He will have to deal with them up front. He chooses to handle Beatrice first. He sees her in the cafeteria with three other soccer girls, then walks over and sits at her table.

He says, flat-out: “Beatrice, I’ve got no idea why you’re mad about what happened on the bus. You’re not the one who got choked, and you’re not the one who got punched in the nose. So I’m only going to say this once: If I did something to upset you, I’m sorry. It wasn’t on purpose.”

(This is one of the moments that really makes you like Roy as a character. He’s not mean or cowardly, he’s straightforward and brave and admirable. How many middle schoolers do you know who would talk like this?)

He then asks what she weighs, and when Beatrice is too boggled to answer, Roy says “I weigh exactly ninety-four pounds, and I’ll bet you’re at least a hundred and five…which means you could probably knock me around the cafeteria all day long. But it wouldn’t prove a darn thing.”

So, he concludes, if she has a problem, she should just tell him and they can “sit down and talk about it like civilized human beings. Okay?”

Beatrice, who is eating a barbecue pork sandwich, is grasping her sandwich so hard that “it had disintegrated.”

One of Beatrice’s friends warns Roy to go now, because this is “so not cool,” so Roy calmly takes his leave, saying “I’m glad we had this chance to get to know each other a little better.”

 —

Roy pays Garrett a dollar to sneak into his mother (the school counselor’s) office, and copy Dana Matherson’s address. After school, Roy asks his mom to stop by the house, and she agrees, assuming he’s picking up books or something from a friend.

Instead, Roy goes up to the Matherson house and asks for Dana when his mom answers the door.

Dana is in pajamas with a mound of gauze around his face.

“I am not believin’ this,” Dana says, but Roy says he’s just come to bring the apology letter.

Dana’s mother asks what’s going on and Roy says he’s the one who got strangled by Dana, and subsequently punched him. This makes Dana’s mother laugh, and she wants to see the letter, but Dana doesn’t let her as he snarls at Roy to “get lost, cowgirl.”

As Roy returns to the car, his mother asks: “Why are those two people wrestling on the porch?”

Roy explains that they’re fighting over his apology letter, and his mother comments, “I hope they don’t hurt each other. They’re both rather husky, aren’t they?”

Comments & Analysis

Opening: Roy’s mother made him stay home all weekend to make sure there was no delayed reaction to the golf-ball bonking.

Closing: “Oh,” Mrs. Eberhardt thoughtfully watched the strange scene through the car window. “I hope they don’t hurt each other. They’re both rather husky, aren’t they?” // “Yes, they are. Can we go home now, Mom?”

OTHER COMMENTS

• I love how Roy is both wise and tough enough to stand up for himself, but in an unusually low-key way. He doesn’t go for much fanfare, he simply sits down at the table with Beatrice and talks to her reasonably. It’s surprising to Beatrice, and to the reader as well. And he does the same with Dana.
• The low-key-ness of it all is also amusing.

Chapter 5

In This Chapter

• Roy discovers the running boy’s campsite and accidentally upends a bag of poisonous snakes with sparkly tails.
• The running boy saves Roy but doesn’t reveal his identity.

Roy finds out that the school decided not to discipline Dana due to his injuries, in order to avoid a lawsuit. As Roy’s parents discuss the “wild tussle between Dana and his mother,” Roy slips out from home and heads to Beatrice Leep’s bus stop, which was where he last saw the running boy.

He gets to the golf course and jogs toward the pine trees. It’s nearing dark when he finds the remains of a campfire. He calls out: “Hello? You there?” but no one answers.

Roy finds three tied plastic garbage bags. One is full of trash, the other has boys’ clothing with no socks or shoes, and the last bag Roy can’t see inside, so he dumps it on the ground.

It looks like a pile of thick brown ropes, until the ropes start to move…and Roy realizes he’s just opened a bag of poisonous cottonmouth moccasin snakes. He notices that the snakes’ tails have been dipped in blue and silver sparkles.

Roy freezes in fear as the snakes curl around his feet, and then a voice behind him says: “Don’t move!”

 —

The next scene begins with a flashback when Roy was in Montana, hiking on a school trip and found himself face to face with a large grizzly with two cubs.

Roy froze until the bears left, standing in one place for two hours and twenty-two minutes, until one of his teachers found him.

This means that Roy is great at standing still, and so that’s exactly what he does as the voice behind him instructs him to step backwards slowly on the count of three.

As he follows the instructions, a hand grabs him from behind and puts a hood over his head, tying a rope around his wrists behind him.

The voice asks him who he is and what he’s doing there, and Roy talks about seeing him (the running boy) twice. Roy can tell that the voice belongs to a boy trying to sound like a man.

The boy walks Roy, still blindfolded, through the pine woods, and then loosens the rope and tells him not to turn around.

“What’s your name?” Roy says. The boy won’t say, but instead gives the nickname: “Mullet Fingers.”

“Don’t turn around until you count to fifty. Otherwise you’re gonna wake up one morning with one of those big ole cottonmouths in your bed. Got it?” the boy says. Roy nods, and starts counting. When he gets to 50, he takes off the hood and finds himself alone in the middle of the driving range.

He bikes home, “more excited than ever.”

Comments & Analysis

Opening: Roy zipped through his homework in an hour. When he came out of his room, he heard his mother talking to his father on the phone.

Closing: Roy ran all the way back to his bicycle and rode home as fast as he could. He wasn’t frightened and he wasn’t discouraged. He was more excited than ever.

OTHER COMMENTS

• We’re making some breakthrough on the mystery, one step closer to the answer to the question “who is the running boy and what is he doing?” but more mysteries are also raised — why does he have poisonous snakes? And why doesn’t he want to reveal himself to Roy?

Chapter 6

In This Chapter

• Roy and his parents read in the news about the vandalism at the pancake house construction site.
• Delinko is scolded for embarrassing the police department, and demoted.
• Roy fails to find the running boy again, and gets his bike stolen.

The next morning at breakfast, Roy asks if it’s against the law for kids his age not to go to school. Yes it is, says his father, it’s called truancy. Roy’s mom thinks his questions are due to his fear over Dana Matherson, but Roy denies it. He can’t tell his parents about Mullet Fingers, though.

Mr. Eberhardt then reads aloud a piece of local news — a Coconut Cove policeman’s cruiser was vandalized on Monday morning at a construction site on East Oriole Avenue, because the policeman had fallen asleep inside the car at the time.

The article further says the officer had been on flu medication that made him drowsy, so he wasn’t aware when his windows were painted black. And this is the third suspicious incident in a week at this location.

Roy finds the story funny, but when his father summarizes the rest of the article, and mentions that someone had left alligators in the porta-potties, Roy recalls that he’d first seen the running boy on West Oriole Avenue.

“The article doesn’t say how big those gators were,” Roy remarked.

His father chuckled. “I don’t think it’s important, son. I think it’s the thought that counts.”

(This is the first time the two storylines are starting to converge, and it’s quite satisfying, and also really funny, which is one of Hiaasen’s signature skills)

 —

The police captain is talking to Officer Delinko, with his sergeant by his side.

They tell him that this incident with the cruiser was embarrassing for the department but that they’ve kept his name from the article and also created the flu medication excuse.

Delinko protests:

“To be honest sir, I haven’t had the flu. And I wasn’t taking any medication yesterday — ”

“David,” the sergeant cut in, “if the chief says you were taking flu medicine, you were definitely taking flu medicine. And if the chief says that’s why you fell asleep in your patrol car, then that’s exactly what happened. Understand?”

“Oh. Yes, sir.”

As a punishment for what Delinko’s done, he is assigned to desk duty for a month. And if anything like this happens again, the captain says, he will lose his job.

Officer Delinko is now personally invested in catching the punks who painted his car. He’s only allowed to drive his car to the unit home and back, and that’s all, but Delinko thinks he can figure out a route that includes swinging past the Mother Paula construction site along the way. Because, after all…

“Nobody said he couldn’t leave his house extra early in the morning. Nobody said he couldn’t take his sweet time getting to work.”

 —

Dana is not in school again, and Roy is both relieved and concerned because the longer Dana is away, “the nastier he would be when he finally returned to Trace Middle.”

Garrett tells Roy that some of the kids are taking bets on how many times Dana will beat Roy up.

When Roy gets home, his mom is distracted by a call, and Roy slips out to the golf course again, with a box. But with a detour. First, he heads to the pancake house construction site and sees a trailer and blue pickup.

As Roy stops his bike, a “stocky bald man” charges out and yells at him. Roy bikes away as the man yells: “That’s right, and don’t you come back! Next time there’ll be guard dogs waiting for you. The meanest damn dogs you ever saw!”

But when Roy reaches the place where he’d spotted the campsite in the pine trees, all trace of the boy is gone. As Roy makes his way back to his bike, it starts to thunder and rain.

Roy discovers his bike is gone and realizes that he’d forgotten to lock it, and it must have been stolen. He’s concerned that his parents will be worried now that he’ll be very late getting home.

As Roy tries to cross a road, he hears a voice barking at him — it’s Beatrice Leep, sitting on his bike. She asks him what’s in his box.

Comments & Analysis

Opening: At breakfast the next morning, Roy asked if it was against the law for a kid his age not to go to school.

Closing: Roy jumped back on the curb and spun around. There was Beatrice Leep, sitting on his bicycle. // She said, “What’s in the shoe box, cowgirl?”

OTHER COMMENTS

• One very powerful thing writers can do when it comes to writing is to figure out the little itchy secret emotions that people indulge in as their “guilty pleasures.” For example, schadenfreude — taking pleasure in someone else’s misfortunes.
• Hiaasen activates that emotion quite well in this chapter with the painting of Delinko’s patrol car, because readers are thinking “serves him right!” for being so self absorbed and silly, and also because this trick is really clever and funny. I wonder how Hiaasen thought it up, actually.

Chapter 7

In This Chapter

• Beatrice Leep “kidnaps” Roy and reveals that she is running boy’s sister.
• Delinko finds Roy out in the rain and takes him home, then tries to win brownie points with Roy’s DOJ dad.

Turned out, Beatrice had seen Roy biking past and followed him to the golf course.

Can I have my bike back? Roy asks, and Beatrice says, maybe later. First, she wants him to hop on the handlebars and go for a ride. Roy obeys and Beatrice powers through, biking to a chain link fence. Behind that is a bunch of wrecked automobiles.

Finally they reach an old ice cream truck and leads him into the back. Beatrice again asks Roy what’s in the box, and he says shoes. Beatrice doesn’t believe him until she sees for herself it is shoes.

Roy says he wanted to give the shoes to the running boy, and Beatrice is snarky to him: “How do you know he wants shoes, Eberhardt?”

Roy says if he doesn’t want them, he’ll keep them. He adds, “Beatrice, if you’re going to beat me up, could you please hurry up and get it over with? My mom and dad are probably calling the National Guard right now.”

But Beatrice asks: “Eberhardt, why do you care about this kid?”

Roy says he doesn’t know, and Beatrice turns on the light. When Roy tries to scramble away, Beatrice easily hauls him back and asks him the shoe size.

Finally, Beatrice promises to get the shoes to the kid, but Roy has to stop spying.

“So you do know him!” Roy says.

Yes, Beatrice replies. He’s my brother.

 —

Officer Delinko is working on paperwork and thinking about his family history of cops, including his father and older brother. Delinko himself wants to be a detective, but it’s a long shot, especially after the vandalism case at the pancake site.

Delinko goes out to his car and hears the radio reporting recent events, including a local boy who went missing on his bike in the electrical storm.

Delinko figures the parents must be worried, but the kid’s probably alright.

Ten minutes later, Delinko sees a rain-soaked boy at the corner of West Oriole, matching the description of the missing boy: about five feet tall, ninety pounds, sandy brown hair.

(And now we get a little of the physical description of Roy).

Delinko drives over and asks if the boy’s name is Roy. Roy confirms, and Delinko offers him a ride. Delinko congratulates himself for his good work.

 —

Roy sits in the cop car, reflecting on what happened earlier.

Beatrice had admitted that Mullet Fingers was her stepbrother, and she’d given him that name “because he can catch mullet with his bare friends. You know how hard that is?”

Mullet Fingers had been sent to a “special” school from which he ran away and hithhiked back home. Their parents don’t know he’s home, and Beatrice isn’t telling them.

When Beatrice had asked Roy how he was going to explain his absence to his parents, Beatrice had “performed an astounding feat — she’d lifted his bicycle by the sprockets and chomped a hole in the rear tire, like she was biting into a pizza.”

(Hahaha! I love how Beatrice uses her teeth rather than a tool, which would be much more practical and much less zany and memorable. And it will lead to two other fun scenes as well. Great choice).

“There! Now you’ve got a flat,” Beatrice says as she gives the bike back to Roy.

“Thanks. I guess,” he replies, and then is jolted out of his reverie when Officer Delinko asks him if he’s heard about any gossip at school about what’s happening at the pancake site.

Roy says no, and they’ve arrived at his house. So Delinko gives him a business card and asks him to keep an eye out. But Roy doesn’t like the feeling of being a snitch, so says nothing.

Delinko helps him get his bike and asks, “Was it a nail that got you?”

“Something like that,” Roy says, as his father comes out to thank the officer for bringing Roy home. Roy hears the two “exchanging law-enforcement chitchat,” so he figures his dad told Delinko about his work for the Justice Department.

As Mr. Eberhardt goes to put the bike away, Delinko asks Roy if he could ask his dad to write a letter to the police chief or sergeant “No biggie, just a nice note about what happened tonight. Something they could put in my permanent file. The little things help, they really do. They add up.”

(Delinko as a character is so well done. On the one hand, he has a good-ish heart, on the other, he’s rather dumb, and also too ambitious to be super likable…a really interesting opponent character for Roy)

Roy’s mom comes out to thank Delinkoand says “You’ve restored my faith in the police. Honestly, I didn’t know what to think after reading that outrageous story in the paper. The one about that policeman who had his windows painted black!”

(Haha! The dramatic irony is delicious, here)

As Roy’s mom continues talking about the painted windows incident, Delinko beats a hasty retreat, much to Roy’s amusement.

Comments & Analysis

Opening: How it happened was no big mystery. // Like all students, Beatrice the Bear lived in the vicinity of her school bus stop. Roy likely had ridden right past her front door, and when Beatrice had spotted him, she’d simply tailed him to the golf course.

Closing: “Maybe there was an emergency,” Mrs. Eberhardt said, watching the patrol car’s taillights disappear into the night. // “Yeah,” said Roy, smiling. “Maybe so.”

OTHER COMMENTS

• Delinko is a great opponent for Roy. One of many, of course. He’s bumbling, self-centered, and cringeworthy, but that gives him room to grow, which he really does in the story.

Chapter 8

In This Chapter

• Curly the foreman hires attack dogs to guard the construction site
• Roy is bullied by Dana, then saved by Beatrice

Roy sticks to his promise not to search for Beatrice’s stepbrother, although it requires a lot of willpower. But even if he wanted to, he can’t go anywhere with a broken bike.

Roy and his dad take his bike to get fixed at the gas station, and the guy tells them the bike tire is beyond repair: “You folks got a pet monkey? Because I swear it looks like teeth marks in the sidewall,” the man says.

(This line the first bonus payoff for Beatrice biting into Roy’s bike. Ha!)

They order another tire, but in the meantime, Roy stays home working on homework and reading novels, missing Montana as it rains all day.

And then Roy gets some unwelcome news: his suspension from the bus has been lifted, thanks to his mom’s request, and Roy isn’t excited about that.

 —

Curly, whose real name is Leroy Branitt, is under pressure because supervising construction isn’t easy, and the multiple delays have really messed up his plans.

A top-level executive of Mother Paula’s, Chuck Muckle, is particularly threatening.

(Honestly. These names! They are awesome. We have Curly, Chuck Muckle, Officer Delinko — which ironically sounds like “delinquent,” Beatrice, Dana, and more…)

Muckle tells Curly that if he doesn’t fix the problem he will be unemployed, soon.

The plan is to clear the site and then bring in media for a ground-breaking ceremony. The highlight is a special appearance by actress Kimberly Lou Dixon, who portrays Mother Paula.

So Curly hires some guard dogs, Rottweilers belonging to a guy with a foreign accent named Kalo. Curly asks their names, and Kalo says:

“That vun dere is Max. That vun, Klaus. That vun, Karl. And that big vun is Pookie Face.”

“Pookie Face?” Curly said.

“Iss my precious baby. I brought him all za way from Munich.”

Curly goes back to his truck satisfied that the giant dogs will keep the vandals away.

 —

As Roy walks to the bust stop, he enjoys the scenery. He reflects on how the ospreys can survive in both states and thinks maybe if they can do it, so can he.

(I like the slow change in Roy’s homesickness arc. He’s slowly starting to feel more like a Florida boy)

When Roy gets on his bus the other kids grow “strangely quiet.” He hears whispering, senses a presence behind him, and sure enough, it’s Dana. Dana isn’t mollified by Roy’s apology letter and threatens to be Roy’s “wortht nightmare.” (the lisp is because Dana still has a purple and puffy nose and a new split lip.

But instead of being intimidated, Roy stands up for himself. “Hit me,” Roy says. “Go ahead. Get it out of your system.”

Dana is stunned for a moment, but when Roy calls him “dumb as a bucket of mud,” Dana lunges for him. he keeps hitting Roy, who tries to pretend not to care, but then the bus stops to pick up a new load of kids.

Roy assumes the pounding will resume once the bus starts driving again, but it doesn’t. Stunned, Roy sits still for blocks, waiting, but when nothing happens, he turns around to see Dana slumped against the window, and a kid from the last bus stop sitting next to him.

“What are you staring at?” Beatrice snaps at him as Roy smiles.

(Ah, I love this. The friendship between these two is just getting started, and Beatrice’s crankiness makes it so much fun) 

Comments & Analysis

Opening: Roy stuck to his promise. He quit searching for Beatrice Leep’s stepbrother, though it required all the willpower he could muster.

Closing: Despite his pounding headache, Roy had to smile. // “Hi, Beatrice,” he said.

OTHER COMMENTS

• I like how Beatrice stands up for Roy by sitting next to Dana. Although in real life, a tough girl probably can’t take on a tough guy just based on physical discrepancies alone, it’s fun to stretch the truth a little in this book, makes it even zanier, and zany is the name of the game here.

Chapter 9

In This Chapter

• Garrett warns Roy that Dana is planning to get him.
• Roy reflects on his only-child-ness.
• The attack dogs are hauled away by their furious caretaker when it turns out that the construction site has snakes.

However, Roy still finds school nerve wracking, as kids keep stopping to stare at him whenever he passes, as if surprised to see he is alive.

In between classes, Garrett drags him to the bathroom and tells him: “You look sick. You should go home early.”

“I feel fine,” Roy says, partly true because he’s still a bit sore from Dana’s thumping on the bus.

Garrett tells him: “Dude, listen to me. I don’t care how you think you feel. You’re sick. Really sick, okay? You need to call your mom and go home.”

(Truby says that true dialogue is not real-life dialogue, it’s much wittier than real life but SOUNDS like it could be real life, and here Hiaasen executes this dialogue excellently).

Roy asks Garrett what he’s heard and Garrett says that Dana will be waiting after seventh period, to snatch Roy before he gets on the bus.

Roy continues to not let the threats phase him, as he thinks through his options. Telling the vice principal wouldn’t work — Dana wouldn’t take her seriously. Telling his parents might make them alarmed enough to withdraw him from school and he’d end up in Catholic school. He could try groveling, but Dana would still hassle him.

So Roy figures he has to stand and fight. He is smart, but Dana is big and strong, so his chances aren’t good. He’s not concerned on his own behalf, but he’s worried about his mom. As an only child, whatever happens to him affects her the most.

He’d almost had a little sister once, but his mom miscarried and ever since Roy has been very conscious about not giving his parents extra reasons to worry about him.

(I love that in Hiaasen’s books, unlike many other children’s books, even though the parents play minor roles, the main character still considers them).

After the last class of the day, Roy lingers after class until the school is almost emptied. He comes up with a shortcut through the gym, planning to be the last to board the bus so he can sit in front and avoid Dana.

But as Roy executes his plan, the author writes: “He almost made it, too.”

 —

Curly is on the phone with Mr. Muckle again, as something else has happened to the construction site despite the guard dogs.

Turns out, someone had put poisonous snakes on the ground with the dogs, poisonous snakes with shiny tails. Kalo is in a tizzy, and as he loads his dogs into his car and leaves, he steps into a owl burrow and twists his ankle.

(And now the audience has just confirmed who the vandal is. The why is also there, if people think about it a little)

Curly calls up the reptile wrangler, staying in his trailer to avoid the snakes, but by the time the wrangler arrives, the snakes are gone.

“Those cottonmouths can kill a person,” Curly says to Muckle.

“Really. Can they kill a bulldozer, too?”

Of course the answer is no, and Curly promises that he will have the grounds cleared first thing Monday morning.

 —

Roy is in a janitorial closet, where Dana has yanked him. In the darkness, Roy tries sneaking away, but Dana grabs him again, squeezing the air out of him in a vicious bear hug.

But just as Roy is losing the fight, Dana is hauled off him. After some time, Roy peeks out of the closet and sees the hallway is deserted and tries to streak for the nearest exit. “He almost made it, too.”

Comments & Analysis

Opening: School was nerve-wracking. Every time Roy entered one of his classrooms, the other kids stopped what they were doing and stared.

Closing: Roy dropped the broom handle and streaked for the nearest exit. He almost made it, too.

OTHER COMMENTS

• Using the “he almost made it, too” line twice at the end of the last two scenes is a great touch. It does make people a bit more aware of the narrator’s hand, but it’s worth it.

Chapter 10

In This Chapter

• Beatrice takes Roy to help her step brother Mullet Fingers who has been bitten by dogs when he was releasing sparkly-tailed snakes

Turns out Roy’s savior was, once again, Beatrice Leep. She “left Dana Matherson stripped down to his underpants and trussed to the flagpole in front of the administration building at Trace Middle School.”

She also “borrowed” a bike, “forcefully installed Roy on the handlebars, and was now churning at a manic pace toward an unknown destination.”

(I love Beatrice. She is an awesome character).

Beatrice tells Roy they’re going to his house, and she needs first aid material and a cover story.

Roy introduces Beatrice to his mother then the two say they’re going over to Beatrice’s to work on a “messy science experiment.” Beatrice also asks for some raw hamburger, which Roy’s mom has, and they take off.

 —

Beatrice lives with her father, a former pro basketball player named Leon Leep. Her mother had divorced Leon to pursue her career “as a cockatoo trainer at Parrot Jungle, a tourist attraction in Miami,” and Beatrice stayed with her father partly because “she was allergic to parrots and partly because she doubted that Leon Leep could survive on his own. He had basically turned into a lump.”

But Leon later remarried to a woman named Lonna, who arrived at the church “towing a somber, bony-shouldered boy with sun-bleached hair and a deep tan.”

Lonna didn’t get along with the boy, and had him sent to a military school. But before that, Beatrice and the boy had “forged a quiet alliance.” When he ran away from school and returned to Coconut Cove, he contacted only Beatrice.

Beatrice shares this story with Roy as they bike to her place, and when he sees the boy’s wounds, he sees why she’s worried. The boy’s left arm is swollen from dog bites.

Roy tries to figure out what happened, but the boy and Beatrice take him to East Oriole Avenue, at the construction site. Roy connects the dots, realizing they have something to do with the painted police ar and the gators in the porta potties.

Turned out, Mullet Fingers got bit when he was putting out snakes to scare away the dogs. Roy is horrified, but Mullet Fingers tells him the snakes mouths were taped and their tails were dipped in sparkle glue to make them easy to find.

Roy still doesn’t know why Mullet Fingers is involve, and Mullet Fingers shows Roy the little burrowing owls by putting out little bits of hamburger. Now Roy understands what’s at stake.

Comments & Analysis

Opening: “I missed my bus,” Roy muttered. // “Big deal. I’m missing soccer practice,” said Beatrice.

Closing: Mullet Fingers chucked him gently on the shoulder. “Okay — now do you get it?” // “Yeah,” said Roy. “I get it.”

OTHER COMMENTS

• It’s the little details that bring things to life, whether we’re talking about art, music, or stories. In this case, the fact that Mullet Fingers glued sparkles to his snakes’ tails and taped their mouths shut and then casually keeps them in a bag is hilarious. Especially when contrasting it with the deadliness of the poison that these snakes have in them.

Chapter 11

In This Chapter

• Beatrice and Roy take Mullet to the hospital to be treated for his dog bites
• Delinko arrives at Roy’s house asking about a stolen bike

Officer Delinko has been cruising around the Mother Paula construction site a lot recently, and earlier that day he saw a “wild-eyed man waving a red umbrella and chasing several giant black dogs around.”

The foreman told him it was a K-9 training exercise, “nothing to be alarmed about,”

(Ha! I love the way Curly blames Delinko for being incompetent, but then he himself lies to cover his own gaffes. Truth is, they’re both incompetent…and hilarious :D)

Delinko decides to swing by again at night to see if he might see the dogs, but the dogs are gone. All he sees is a little owl…and a ragged strip of green cloth fluttering at the top of the wire mesh. Delinko grabs the fabric, then drives down the street.

 —

Beatrice is pedaling her bike furiously, with Mullet Fingers slumped across the handlebars, and Roy is running behind her. Mullet obviously needs a doctor, but isn’t willing to give himself away.

Just then, Roy sees a police cruiser and he tries to flag it down, but Beatrice slings her stepbrother over one shoulder and takes off running between two houses.

Roy decides to forget the police car and run after the others, and eventually catches up to Beatrice resting under a tree in a stranger’s yard, cradling an unconscious Mullet Fingers.

“What are we gonna do now, cowgirl?” Beatrice asks.

 —

Curly decides to personally guard the construction site himself, as Chuck Muckle has just about lost patience with him. He brings a gun with him, and watches TV when a commercial for Mother Paula’s pancake house comes on.

There’s a storm outside, and his TV signal goes out. Curly then hears a sound in the bathroom, and, fearing snakes, brings his gun with him. He opens the door and shoots, but it’s just a little mouse. Unfortunately, he’s already shot the commode.

 —

Roy’s dad is in the den when his wife comes over and says the policeman that brought Roy home the other day is here.

The couple go out to talk to Officer Delinko, who tells them that he saw a couple of kids on East Oriole, one of whom looked like Roy, who waved at him and then took off.

When Officer Delinko went to investigate, he found a bike stolen from the school. Roy’s mom immediately sticks up for him, saying Roy is not a thief.

The officer lets them see the bike, and Mrs. Eberhardt feels a bit uncomfortable — the bike looks like the one Beatrice was wearing.

When Officer Delinko shows them a scrap of green cloth and asks if it looks familiar, they both say it’s not Roy’s.

The phone rings and Mrs. Eberhardt goes to answer it. Officer Delinko then takes this opportunity to wink-wink-nudge-nudge Mr. Eberhardt to write him a note for his permanent file saying they appreciate him helping out Roy.

Mr. Eberhardt reluctantly agrees to help, but before he can get Officer Delinko’s sergeant’s name, Mrs. Eberhardt rushes out saying that Roy’s in the emergency room.

Comments & Analysis

Opening: Officer David Delinko had made a habit of driving past the consruction site every morning on the way to the police station, and again every afternoon on his way home.

Closing: “Lizzy, what’s the matter?” Mr. Eberhardt called out. “Who was that on the phone?” // “The emergency room!” she cried breathlessly. “Roy’s been hurt!”

OTHER COMMENTS

• The mystery is already “solved” on the reader’s end at this point. We know who the vandal is, and why, but Delinko still doesn’t know, so from this point on, the dramatic irony carries the reader forward — we still want to see when Delinko will figure it out and what his reaction will be when he does. Curly too, for that matter.

Chapter 12

In This Chapter

• Beatrice and Roy come up with several whoppers to tell the doctor
• Beatrice won’t tell Roy Mullet’s real name
• Delinko drives the Eberhardts to the hospital and everything is in chaos when they find the hospital bed empty…until Roy reveals himself

Beatrice thanks Roy as they sit in the waiting room of the Coconut Cove Medical Center’s emergency room. They’d brought Mullet Fingers here for treatment.

“He’s going to be all right,” Roy says and squeezes Beatrice’s hands, since she looks like she’s about to cry. “He’s a tough little cockroach,” Beatrice says. “He’ll be okay.”

The doctor comes out, a lady named Dr. Gonzalez, and she asks the two what happened to “Roy.”

Apparently Roy had let Mullet borrow his name and identification because Mullet refused to let them contact his mother.

Beatrice continues the lie, saying her brother got bitten by dogs at soccer practice, but the doctor knows the wounds on his arms aren’t fresh, based on the infection, which is at least 18–24 hours old.

“Yeah, that sounds a bit right,” Roy says as he elaborates that Mullet (or “Roy”) passed out for a day and then came home the next day.

The reason her brother didn’t contact their parents, Beatrice says, is because their parents work on a crab-fishing boat and are often gone for long periods.

When Roy is asked for his name, he gives the name “Tex.”

Of course the doctor’s not buying any of this, until Beatrice quietly says “Sometimes he runs away from home…and he doesn’t come back for a while.” Which is actually true, and gets the doctor to back off.

“I’m going to go check on Roy now,” she says. “In the meantime, you two might want to polish up your story.”

(Haha!)

Beatrice and Roy discuss what to do next, knowing their lies won’t hold up forever. Then Beatrice has to head home to cook dinner for her dad, and Roy is a bit miffed at being left alone. Roy asks to know Mullet’s real name at least, but Beatrice says that’s for Mullet to reveal if he wants to.

(Setting up another mini-mystery, nice).

Roy returns to the waiting room, recalling one time when he and his father witnessed a man who died in a car crash. Roy never wanted to see that again, and so didn’t want to hang out in the emergency room, and wanders around the hospital until he hears familiar voices raised in agitation.

Roy realizes he has no choice but to reveal himself: “Mom! Dad! I’m right here!” he says.

 —

We rewind a bit to start the next scene:

Turns out Officer Delinko had offered to drive the Eberhardts to the hospital (hoping to “score points” with Roy’s father), and along the way, Mrs. Eberhardt speculates that perhaps Roy had gotten bitten by a dog because of all the hamburger meat he’d used for his (ahem) “science project.”

But when they get to the hospital, the doctor is on a break and the clerk refuses to let them in until Mr. Eberhardt threatens him. Just then, Dr. Gonzalez appears. She eyes them curiously. “You sure don’t look like you work on a crab boat,” she comments.

The Eberhardt’s have no idea what this means, but as they’re impatient to see Roy, Dr. Gonzalez leads them back to the room.

However, as they arrive there, all they see is an empty bed with various IVs disconnected and dangling to the floor.

Roy’s parents start yelling and everyone is frantic and just then Roy steps in and reveals himself to his parents.

Officer Delinko is relieved to see Roy is not wearing a green shirt, but Dr. Gonzalez calls a halt. If he’s Roy, then who’s the other boy who was in the hospital bed?

All the adults turn to Roy who can only say he doesn’t know the boy’s name or location, and that’s actually true.

Comments & Analysis

Opening: Roy was exhausted. It seemed like a hundred years ago that Dana Matherson had tried to strangle him inside the janitor’s closet, but it had happened only that afternoon.

Closing: “I don’t know the boy’s name, and I don’t know where he is,” he said. “I’m sorry, but that’s the truth.” // And, technically, it was.

OTHER COMMENTS

• One of Hiaasen’s writing tricks used to great effect in this book is the use of strategically withholding information from both characters and readers.
• When readers have info characters don’t have, we get dramatic irony, and a looking forward to the big reveal, as in when we find out that Roy lent Mullet his name, and his parents don’t know that. So when the hospital bed is empty, they’re freaking out, but we the reader knows that Roy is right there behind them. And we want to see the aftermath of what happens when Roy reveals himself.
• When readers don’t get info that the characters have, we get a sense of suspense, a desire to figure out what’s going on and why (as in the earlier chapter when Roy is trying to escape Dana and the narrator says “he almost made it, too.” With an ending line like that, you HAVE to turn the page to figure out who stopped him and why)

Chapter 13

In This Chapter

• Roy tells his dad about the owls in danger.

After dinner, Roy’s father calls him into the den, and Roy appears, carrying a book about birds. Roy shows his father page 278, which is about burrowing owls.

Roy tells his dad everything that happened — minus the poisonous snakes — and says that Mullet is trying to save the owls from the Mother Paula people who plan to raze the place down and kill the owls to build their pancake house.

Roy’s dad takes him on a walk and they chat a bit about the past and the current situation. Roy asks his dad not to turn Mullet in, and his dad winks and says “How can I, if I don’t even know where to find him?”

At night as his mom is tucking him in to bed, she tells him that she knows his heart was in the right place, but letting another boy borrow his identity was a serious issue, and a lie.

Roy protests that Mullet needed to borrow his name in order to see the doctor, he was too sick. Roy’s mom asks why he wouldn’t give out his real name, and why he ran from the hospital.

Roy tells her that his mom didn’t want Mullet, and shipped him off to military school. Roy can tell that hearing that another mom didn’t want her son pains his mother, but all she says is that she is proud of Roy.

Comments & Analysis

Opening: While Roy took a shower, his mother made a pot of spaghetti. He ate three helpings, though the dinner gathering was as quiet as a chess match.

Closing: She’d already answered the question, anyway. All he had to do was settle the argument between his heart and his brain.

OTHER COMMENTS

• This is a fairly short chapter, in terms of density of activity. It is a slower-paced chapter, but after all the zany action of the previous chapters, it’s a good fit, here. You can’t have a book be go-go-go all the time, especially when it’s not a thriller, but a middle grade adventure story.
• And it’s nice to see Roy explain the stakes and what’s going on to a trusted adult. You rarely get to see great adult characters and adult-child relationships in books in general, and I love how Hiaasen portrays Roy’s relationship with his parents here. His parents aren’t stupid or incompetent, but they also don’t get in the way of his story.

Chapter 14

In This Chapter

• Roy tries and fails to make peace with Dana
• Roy visits Mullet in the junkyard and Mullet reveals his deeper motivation for his vandalism
• Mullet shows Roy his nickname-worthy ability of catching mullet bare-handed

The next day is a Saturday so Roy has no bus to catch, but the phone rings for him — it’s Garrett, inviting him to go skateboarding. The real reason, though, is Garrett wanted to ask what really happened to Dana Matherson.

“No comment,” Roy says, and says he’ll see Garrett on Monday.

Roy finds the Leep household in the phone book and bikes over. Lonna opens the door, with Beatrice behind her, and Lonna sends Roy away rudely.

Next stop, Dana Matherson’s house. Mr. Matherson opens the door, a thin, jittery and unhealthy-looking man who immediately assumes that Roy is there to collect money for doing his son’s homework.

Dana then comes over and sees Roy and tries to take a swing at him, but Roy ducks and Dana hits a bird feeder. Roy tries to observe that every time Dana tries to hurt him (Roy), Dana gets himself hurt. Roy realizes trying to make peace with Dana is hopeless, so he leaves.

 —

Next, Roy sneaks over to the junkyard and finds Mullet in the ice cream truck. He’s brought water and is glad to see Mullet looks better. Roy tells Mullet that he’s talked to his dad about the owls, but there’s nothing they can do.

“Come on, Tex, you gotta start thinkin’ like an outlaw!” Mullet encourages him. He tells Roy that Roy crossed the line helping him (Mullet) because he (Roy) cared. And in the same way, Mullet cares about the owls.

Mullet tells Roy that all his life he’s watched the natural places in his home disappear — woods, creeks, glades, beaches. And he wants to fight back. He mentions that he and Beatrice did try to write a letter to the pancake house, but only got a form letter in response.

Then Mullet tells Roy that if he wants to join in, to meet him “you know where” at sunset and bring a socket wrench. Then Mullet decides to show Roy something cool, and takes off running again.

 —

The next scene begins with a brief history of a half-sunken boat, the Molly Bell, which is where Mullet brings Roy. Roy asks Mullet about his parents, but Mullet says that he just “never connected” with his mom and his dad disappeared too long ago for him to have known him.

Just then, a school of mullet start swimming by, and Mullet Fingers has Roy hold him by the ankles as he reaches into the water and comes up with a baby mullet fish in his hands.

Roy is impressed. How did you do that?

With practice, Mullet Fingers says.

Then Roy asks Mullet what his plans are for the Mother Paula site tonight? Mullet mischievously says the only way to find out is to be there in person.

Comments & Analysis

Opening: Luckily the next day was Saturday, so Roy didn’t have to get up early to catch the school bus. // As he sat down for breakfast, the phone rang. It was Garrett.

Closing: Mullet Fingers, who was shaking a snail off one of his new sneakers, flashed a mischievous glance. “There’s only one way to find out,” he said. “Be there.”

OTHER COMMENTS

• And we end the chapter with yet another small hook. Readers at this point are invested in these characters, know that Mullet is a clever vandal, and want to see what tricks he has up his sleeve to fight against Mother Paula.

Chapter 15

In This Chapter

• Roy tricks Dana into breaking into the Mother Paula construction site
• Curly and Delinko catch Dana

Roy sits on his bedroom floor debating whether or not to go to the Mother Paula site. At last he decides to go out.

First, he drops by Dana’s house, snooping until he finds Dana’s window. Then he hits the glass to get Dana’s attention, and then moons him. Dana comes out and Roy starts running, slowly, to make sure Dana can keep up.

Finally, Roy allows Dana to catch him, and as Dana weakly tries to beat him up (winded from the long run), Roy says he knows where to get a whole case of cigarettes.

Roy makes Dana promise never to beat him up again, and Dana says “All right, little cowgirl, I’ll never ever pound on your sorry butt again. Okay? Swear on my father’s grave. That good enough for ya?”

“Your father’s still alive,” Roy points out.

“Then I swear on Natalie’s grave. Now tell me where those [ciggies] are stashed. I ain’t kiddin’.”

It turns out that Natalie is Dana’s mother’s deceased pet parakeet, the “only dead person I know,” Dana says.

(Ha! He calls a parakeet a person!)

And then Roy tells Dana to go to the corner of East Oriole, to an empty lot, where a construction trailer is.

Dana pushes Roy down and runs off.

 —

Curly the foreman has spent the entire weekend on the construction site and all appears to have gone well. Nothing is disturbed, no snakes are present, everything’s fine until he hears a noise, and discovers a boy trying to break into his trailer.

When Curly asks who the kid is, he says “Roy Eberhardt.”

Curly accuses the boy of being the vandal and doesn’t believe him when he denies it. Then the boy pulls Curly off balance and runs off as Curly yells after him.

 —

Officer Delinko takes Saturday off, watching TV and going to buy frozen pizza. Per his routine, he takes a detour near Mother Paula’s, and sees a “bulky figure…advancing in an odd halting gait.”

Delinko sees that it’s a “husky teenaged boy” but he walks with a “sharp clacking sound” due to something flat and rectangular attached to each sneaker. Rattraps, of course.

Delinko picks up the boy and puts him in the backseat when he sees Curly rushing toward him. “You caught him!” Curly says.

Who? Delinko asks. “Roy Eberhardt!” Curly says, and Delinko says that’s definitely not Roy.

Delinko’s excited, thinking he’s caught the Mother Paula vandal. They try to question the boy, but he is recalcitrant. The only thing he asks is if either of the men have cigarettes.

Comments & Analysis

Opening: Roy sat cross-legged on the floor, gazing up at the cowboy poster from the Livingston rodeo. He wished he was as brave as a champion bull rider, but he wasn’t.

Closing: The boy smiled crookedly. “What if I got a question?” // “Go right ahead and ask it.” // “Okay, I will,” said Dana Matherson. “Either of you dorks got a cigarette I could bum?”

OTHER COMMENTS

• Again with the dramatic irony. We readers know that Curly and Delinko have just caught the wrong boy and think he’s the vandal when we know what’s really going on. Now there’s an open loop of — when are they going to figure out they’ve got the wrong person, and now that Roy has helped Mullet get the police and foreman out of the way, what kind of tricks will Mullet pull this time?

Chapter 16

In This Chapter

• Curly discovers that the vandal has struck again, despite recently jailing a young delinquent that he thought was the vandal
• Roy and his family go on a trip to the Everglades
• Beatrice hides out under Roy’s bed after things get “hairy” at home

On a Sunday, the Eberhardts’ lunch is interrupted when Garrett shows up to take Roy skateboarding.

Garrett tells Roy that Dana Matherson got “busted” last night, and Roy tries to act surprised. Not just that, but Dana has a rap sheet, busted before for shoplifting, etc. Meaning he’s going to juvenile hall.

Meaning Roy now doesn’t have to watch his back all the time at school, although he is a little guilty about the cigarette story. At the same time, he thinks putting Dana behind bars is “a public service.”

 —

Curly is home, thinking that he’s safe now that the Mother Paula vandal has been caught. But when Curly drives to return a rented video, he remembers that he left his gun behind at the construction site.

Curly hurries back to the lot looking for the gun, but can’t find it. Worried, he searches the grounds methodically and finds nothing until he sees a bare footprint and another leading toward the bulldozers.

Uneasy, Curly follows the footprints and realizes that the driver’s seat on the bulldozers are gone on all of the machines. Without seats, the machines are useless. He realizes that either the vandal had an accomplice, or someone else snuck on the property afterwards.

Curly then heads for the porta potties to use them, but as he checks the latrines for alligators, he finds something else — his gun.

 —

Roy wants to sneak to the junkyard to ask Mullet what happened, but his mother enforces the “Sunday rule,” meaning the family needs to spend time together. They decide to go on an airboat trip throught he everglades.

Roy enjoys the trip, looking at various animals and realizes that “Once you got away from all the jillions of people, Florida was just as wild as Montana.”

(This part only takes a few paragraphs, it doesn’t need to be a full scene. Told, not shown)

That night, Roy goes to bed, thinking about why Mullet is so insistent on saving the owls, and how that represents his desire to save all of it — “all the wild places that were in danger of being wiped out.”

Roy’s parents come in to say goodnight and he thanks them for the trip to the Everglades, thinking to himself “his mom and his dad were still his best friends, and they could be fun to hang out with.”

(This is one of the reasons Hoot and also Hiaasen’s other book, Flush, are two of my favorite middle grade adventures — I can’t recall many middle grade or young adult books that show a good relationship between children and parents. Usually the parents are a complete afterthought, or not included at all, when in real life, that is not the case. 

(Of course it’s tricky in fiction when the main character is the child, to include the adult in a meaningful way without letting them take over the story, but I think Hiaasen does a good job here.)

Roy’s parents tell him about Dana being arrested and pretending to be him, and Roy admits Garrett told him.

As they are leaving, Roy asks his dad if there’s a way to check up on the legality of the pancake house’s paperwork. He tells him to check the City Hall building department, and leave Roy to fall asleep.

Just as Roy is drowsing off, however, Roy hears someone whispering his name. When he realizes it’s not in a dream, Roy sits up.

“Roy, don’t freak out…it’s me,” says the voice, and he realizes it’s Beatrice, under the bed.

Turns out she has been in the house all afternoon, while the family was gone, entering the house by popping the sliding door on the porch off its track.

(This is so illegal, but so hilarious, and it makes you like Beatrice even more.)

“Are you completely wacko?” Roy snaps at her. “Did somebody kick you in the head at soccer practice, or what?”

Beatrice apologizes and says things at home had gotten “kinda hairy,” and Roy immediately calms down. Apparently, Lonna and her dad got into a huge fight, and Roy commiserates with her, thinking how hard it’d be to live in a house where the grownups behave like idiots.

Roy lets Beatrice stay for the night, as long as his parents don’t find out, and Beatrice thanks him, calling him “Roy” instead of “Tex” or “cowgirl,” for the first time.

Roy tries to offer her the bed, but Beatrice insists on the floor. They talk a bit about Mullet and Roy says it can’t go on forever, he will get caught. Beatrice says she knows, but they can’t stop him, “he’s too darn thickheaded.”

“Then I guess we’ve gotta join him,” Roy says.

(This is a very strange, but somehow very heartwarming friendship, and I’m here for it. It’s rare that you have a solid middle grade book depicting strong organic friendships and zero romance, and I like that this book does it so well, and with humor.)

Comments & Analysis

Opening: The doorbell rang while the Eberhardts were eating lunch. “On a Sunday, honestly!” Roy’s mother said.

Closing: “Then I guess we’ve gotta join him.” // “‘Scuse me?” // “G’night, Beatrice.”

OTHER COMMENTS

• The best part of this chapter is Beatrice. Even though she’s tough enough to break bones, and strip bullies to their underwear and hang them on flagpoles, there’s a vulnerable side to her as well.
• For one, she cares a lot about her stubborn stepbrother and protects him as best she can. That protection extends to Roy when it turns out that Roy cares for Mullet’s well-being by bringing a gift of shoes, and she big-sister protects him from Dana, more than once.
• Then, in this chapter we’re reminded that no matter how bike-tire-chompingly tough Beatrice is, she’s still a girl, not yet a woman, and it’s hard on her when her parents are violent psycho idiots at home.
• But just to make sure that this revelation isn’t too sappy, Hiaasen adds a splash of his signature humor by having Beatrice sneak into Roy’s house and hide under the bed like she’s playacting some kind of nightmare closet monster. It’s so bizarre it’s hilarious.

Chapter 17

In This Chapter

• Curly is told by his boss Chuck Muckle not to mention anything about the owls on the construction site
• Delinko uses a trick to confirm that Dana is not the Mother Paula vandal

Curly dreads picking up the phone, knowing Chuck Muckle is on the other side. He spills out the story of what happened — that a young man was arrested for attempted burglary, but on the very same night, someone else removed the seats of all the bulldozers and backhoes.

Curly has ordered new seats, but they won’t arrive until Wednesday, which, by coincidence, Muckle says, is the last day that their actress Kimberly Lou Dixon is available.

The new plan is to do the groundbreaking on Wednesday, without the site clearing. All Curly has to do is lock down the construction site for the next 48 hours.

At this point, Curly asks about the owls, and Muckle shoots back: “What owls? Those burrows are abandoned, remember?…There’s no law against destroying abandoned nests.”

“But what if one a them owls shows up?” Curly asks, only to be shouted down: “What owls! There are no owls on that property and don’t you forget it, Mr. Branitt…Somebody sees one, you tell him it’s a — I don’t know, a robin or a wild chicken or something.”

(Haha! I wonder why the word chicken is so funny, but for some reason it is. maybe in part because of the way it sounds with that hard percussive sound but also because of the type of animal it describes. Chickens are pretty dumb, in a cute way)

 —

When Roy awakes, Beatrice is gone, and over breakfast Roy’s dad reads the news about Dana’s arrest. At school, the gossip about Dana’s arrest is all the rage and many are eager to get Roy’s take on it, but Roy keeps his head down.

Garrett adds a new odd detail to the story: Apparently, Dana had been arrested with rattraps stuck on his shoes.

Roy looks for Beatrice but can’t find her, and one of her teammates says that she broke a tooth falling down some steps at home, which makes Roy uneasy, knowing that as a gifted athlete, there’s no way Beatrice tripped and fell at home.

 —

The police captain congratulates Delinko for catching the Matherson kid, but Delinko knows that his interview with Dana didn’t go so well — the kid didn’t confess to any vandalism, just to wanting to steal cigarettes.

Even the captain observes that Dana seems more of a thief than a practical joker. Dumping alligators in the potty doesn’t seem like something he’d do.

Another clue: Delinko found another piece of shirt at the crime scene which was tied to the antenna of his squad car.

But there’s not enough evidence to find another vandal, so the captain tells him that officially, Dana is their perp. Which means there better not be another incident or else the captain will “look like a complete bozo.”

So Delinko’s mission is to “make sure there’s no more surprises between now and the Mother Paula’s groundbreaking ceremony on Wednesday.”

(Nice to see the story threads and character motivations aligning. Now Delinko and Curly have the same goal and we will have to see how it will be foiled…)

Delinko is promoted back to being on the road and has gotten a letter of commendation on capturing the suspect. Also, he’s now on special patrol at Mother Paula’s, beginning at dusk. Unfortunately, because they’re short-staffed, Delinko will be on his own.

He is warned not to fall asleep, or he will be terminated, and Delinko decides to drive by the juvenile detention center once more to check on Dana.

Again, he tries to get Dana confess to painting his car windows, but Delinko gets nowhere with that. Then Delinko reaches into a shopping bag and drops something in the boy’s lap. Dana starts screeching and bucking in panic, even though it’s just a rubber alligator that Delinko bought at a tourist shop.

Delinko has just confirmed that Dana could not be the real Mother Paula vandal. His job of holding down the fort for 48 hours has just gotten much harder.

(So Delinko is not the dumb-dumb we all think he is, or he’s wisening up now…)

 —

At home, Roy researches the burrowing owls and then bikes to city hall. He uses the excuse of working on a school project to ask about the Mother Paula file. But when he asks for the construction permits, the clerk tells him that the file’s not there. Apparently it’s been “checked out.”

“Okay, I’ll be back tomorrow, “Roy says, although the clerk tries to deter him.

Then Roy bikes to the junkyard, but Mullet isn’t there. So he heads to the Mother Paula site, and again no one is there, but he sees that the bulldozer seats are missing, and he immediately puts two and two together.

Just then, a bald guy comes racing after him. Roy says he was just trying to feed the owls, and the bald guy looks agitated: “What owls? There ain’t no owls around here.”

When Roy insists that there are, the bald man says: “Lissen to me, boy. You didn’t see no damn owls, okay? What you saw was a…was a wild chicken!”

Roy doesn’t buy it, despite the flustered man’s shouting, and he bikes away, imagining that he is on a Montana mountain.

Comments & Analysis

Opening: Curly stared hard at the phone, as if staring would make it quit ringing. Finally he braced himself and picked up the receiver.

Closing: He wouldn’t stop until he reached the crest of his imaginary Montana mountain and coasted downhill into the coolness of the valley.

OTHER COMMENTS

• Delinko’s redemption arc begins. First step, prove that he’s not a blithering idiot by having him come up with an actual clever method of ascertaining whether or not Dana is the true vandal. Buying a rubber alligator to check Dana’s reaction is a simple but smart method of doing just that.

Chapter 18

In This Chapter

• Curly and Delinko talk about the owls on the property
• Roy sees an ad for the Mother Paula groundbreaking ceremony taking place in a few days
• Beatrice reveals to Roy the real reason why she broke a tooth
• Roy comes up with a plan to help Mullet save the owls

Curly tells Delinko that he caught a “scrawny brat” (Roy) poking around the area, but he scared him away. It’s midnight at the construction site and Curly and Delinko are standing by the police car, chatting.

Delinko hasn’t told Curly about the fact that Dana is too scared of fake alligators to have done the alligator trick, and Curly hasn’t told Delinko that the bulldozer seats were stolen while Dana was in custody.

But both are on the same page regarding protecting the property.

When Delinko asks Curly about the guard dogs, Curly decides to head back to his trailer and go to sleep. Delinko trips over a hole, and sees a baby owl in the ground.

He backs up to give the baby’s parents space to come back, and bumps into a bulldozer. And then he realizes what will happen to the owls if he does his job properly, “and it weighted him with an aching and unshakeable sorrow.”

(How about it? Delinko has a conscience, too! I like how the opponent character isn’t just a dumb, self-serving clown, but is starting to fill out and be more complex and interesting)

 —

When Roy sits down for breakfast, he sees an ad for the Mother Paula groundbreaking ceremony in the paper, and drops his spoon. Roy asks to borrow his mom’s camera and decides to go to Beatrice’s house.

When Beatrice shows up, Roy showers her with questions about her brother, and if she saw the news, and Beatrice tells him they’ll talk on the bus.

Turns out Beatrice did not break a tooth falling down steps but while “biting a ring off one of her stepmother’s toes,” which was made of a charm that Beatrice’s mother had left when she moved. “Beatrice had taken exception to the theft.”

(I love the clinical way the author describes what probably was a really messy scene. It’s a great way to add humor.)

“If my old man wanted Lonna to have it, he woulda given it to her,” she growled.

“So you gnawed it off her toe? How?” Roy was astounded.

“Wasn’t easy.”

(And another humorous writing trick here — answering a reinterpreted question. Roy is clearly asking how she would even get the idea to do such a thing, but Beatrice answers the question as if Roy was asking her how she did it technically/practically… 

(Writing this makes me realize why humor is so hard to teach. It’s hard to analyze. It’s better to absorb it by osmosis)

“She was awake when you did this?” Roy asks, still pursuing the “how” question.

“Yeah, but she probably wishes she wasn’t,” Beatrice answers.

Then she tells him what really happened the night she snuck into his house — Mullet had come by the house so Beatrice could bring him some clean shirts, when her dad saw him and the two started chatting. Lonna then showed up and was furious to see her son, and the two adults got into a major argument.

Then when Roy shows Beatrice the news, Beatrice is not sure whether to tell her brother or not, but Roy says they do more than tell him — they join him. He’s got a plan. He takes out his camera and shows Beatrice as he tells her what it is.

 —

Roy misses homeroom because he’s summoned to the Vice Principal’s office. They’ve heard that a young man fled from the hospital emergency room, using Roy’s name.

Miss Hennepin is concerned about truancy, and because Roy hasn’t any info to give her, she lets him go, but says “I know when I smell a rat.”

Yeah, thinks Roy. That’s because you’re growing one on your lip.

(Interesting how Delinko is growing better, but Hennepin is getting worse)

At lunchtime, Roy borrows Garrett’s bike and heads for the junkyard. He tells Mullet about the groundbreaking ceremony taking place in 24 hours, but Mullet is surprisingly calm about it.

(Ticking clock!)

Roy gives him the camera and says that if he can get a picture of the owls, they can stop the bulldozers. Roy says he looked it up on the internet and the owls are protected. Plus the special permit the company needs is missing from City Hall.

Mullet throws Roy out of the truck, saying “I already caused enough trouble for you and my sister. This is my war from now on.”

Roy leaves the camera with him, though.

 —

For history class, Roy has a current events presentation. Instead of choosing a story from the newspaper, he uses the Mother Paula ad and talks about the owls and the groundbreaking ceremony.

(For this part, the author actually writes out Roy’s entire speech, with student reactions as well).

Roy tells everyone it’s happening tomorrow at noon and that when he checked the permit file, it was missing, and the foreman tried to chase him away. So Roy says tomorrow at noon he’s going to go to the groundbreaking ceremony and stand up for the owls.

When Roy sits, the class is silent.

Comments & Analysis

Opening: Some scrawny brat I seen around here last week,” Curly complained to Officer Delinko, “only this time I caught the little bugger!”

Closing: The classroom fell quiet, a long heavy silence that roared in Roy’s ears like a train.

OTHER COMMENTS

• And our ticking clock is introduced. In general, it’s a good idea to give readers an idea of what is coming and when, kind of like how the best trains and buses give ETAs to riders. It improves the psychological experience of the ride (or in this case, the story).
• Knowing that the ceremony is taking place “tomorrow at noon” tells readers that they can’t stop reading now — the showdown is on its way!

Chapter 19

In This Chapter

• Curly advises Delinko to stop thinking about the owls
• Roy gets permission to go to the groundbreaking ceremony and activates his plan
• Chuck Muckle arrives on site for the ceremony

Delinko tells Curly he’s worried about the owls, and Curly says “What owls?” When Delinko presses, Curly says “Don’t think about it. Put it out of your mind, is what I do.”

“I can’t,” Delinko says, and Curly offers to watch a movie instead. Delinko wonders if the pancake company knows about the owls and Curly says that they “know everything.”

After midnight, Curly alerts Delinko to a strange sound, but neither man sees anything. The rest of the night passes uneventfully.

 —

At breakfast, Roy asks for permission to go to the groundbreaking, and his dad says yes. Beatrice is waiting outside of homeroom with a parental note, and she also has the camera, which her brother had dropped off last night with the pictures of the owls that Roy wanted.

Roy grabs the camera, excited.

 —

Delinko is at the construction site when a limousine pulls up and disgorges Chuck Muckle, vice president of Mother Paula’s. Delinko is off duty, but happy to help.

Muckle has the actress, Kimberly Lou Dixon, with them, and she needs a powder room. Delinko takes her to Curly’s trailer.

Muckle asks Delinko if he was the officer who fell asleep on the job, and creates an awkward situation, until Miss Dixon comes out and interrupts them.

Comments & Analysis

Opening: “I’m worried about the owls,” Officer Delinko told Curly. // “What owls?”

Closing: “Listen, I’d better hurry up and start turning myself into adorable old Mother Paula. Can one of you sweethearts please fetch my suitcase out of the limo?”

OTHER COMMENTS

• The pace is ramping up in the story as you can see by the shorter scenes in this chapter and the way it switches POVs to cover more characters than in previous chapters, where we would spend a lot of time with just one or two character POVs.

Chapter 20

In This Chapter

• Roy interrupts the groundbreaking ceremony to protest about the owls
• Unexpected allies show up to support the protest
• Mullet reveals his trump card for protecting the owls

The mayor, chamber of commerce president, and media people show up to the site, and soon Roy and Beatrice arrive too.

Roy is surprised to see other kids are there too, including half of Roy’s history class. Then Beatrice’s soccer teammates show up as well. No one can see Mullet though, or the owls, because they’re frightened by the noise.

Finally, the actress comes out in her Mother Paula costume.

Mr. Muckle gives his speech, then gold plated shovels are handed out for a photo op, and just as they’re wrapping up, Roy shouts at them: “If you hurt a single one of our owls, I’m not eating any more of your stupid pancakes.”

(The fact that Roy calls them “OUR” owls shows that he feels like he’s finally belonging)

Kimberly the actress is confused: “What’re you talking about? What owls?”

Muckle grabs the megaphone, but Kimberly fends him off. Roy points to the holes in the ground and tells them that those are owl homes. The kids from school start holding up hand-lettered signs like: “Bird killers go home!”

Muckle claims there are no owls, but Roy says he has proof — and pulls out the camera.

Unfortunately, the images are completely blurred and not usable as evidence at all. Mullet wasn’t good at using the camera.

Again, Muckle tries to dismiss the crowd, but another voice yells: “It ain’t over! Not by a mile it ain’t.”

This time, it’s Mullet himself. He’s buried himself in the ground so that only his head is sticking out.

Muckle yells for Delinko to arrest the boy, but since the event is open to the public, Delinko refuses to comply. When Muckle turns to Curly, Mullet says “wouldn’t try that.” And then he has Roy check a bucket next to his (Mullet’s) head.

Roy does, and says the bucket is full of cottonmouth moccasins, and Muckle tells Delinko to shoot the snakes, but Delinko again refuses — it’s too dangerous around all these people.

Delinko questions Mullet — are you the one who ran from the hospital and painted my car and hung your shirt on my antenna?

No comment, Mullet says until the end when he says “Man, you don’t understand. The owls got no chance against those machines.”

But Delinko says he does understand. And he asks to look in the bucket.

Roy whispers to Beatrice — “We’ve gotta do something quick. Those snakes aren’t real.”

But when Delinko peeks into the bucket, he says the boy is telling the truth, and advises Muckle to negotiate. But Muckle grabs a shovel and knocks over the bucket, hacking at the snakes furiously until he realizes they’re all rubber.

Muckle then turns to Mullet, intending to dig him out by force. But Roy jumps protectively in front of Mullet, then Beatrice stands next to him and grabs his hand. Then Garrett grabs Roy’s other hand, Beatrice’s soccer team links up on her other side, and more and more kids slip out of the crowd, forming a human barricade as no parents try to stop them.

The TV cameraman starts talking about the live protest and Muckle gives up trying to dismiss everyone.

Beatrice starts singing “This Land is Your Land,” and everyone takes up the song, including Mother Paula herself. The protest goes on for another hour, ignoring Muckle’s pleas to the lawmen to arrest the protestors.

And then Lonna Leep shows up trying to grab the limelight by claiming the boy as her son. But Beatrice has everyone lock arms, blocking her stepmother. The moment is broken when a small owl flying overhead lands right on Mullet’s head.

Comments & Analysis

Opening: A smaller limousine delivered the Coconut Cove mayor, Councilman Bruce Grandy, and the chamber of commerce president to the construction site.

Closing: There was Mullet Fingers, trying not to giggle, the daredevil owl perched calmly on the crown of his head. // “Don’t worry, little guy,” the boy said. “You’re safe for now.”

OTHER COMMENTS

• Although the last chapter featured multiple scene jumps, this one has all of the various characters together in one place at one time at last, so we have no scene jumps. This is showdown time!
• We get to see not only our main heroes (Roy, Mullet, Beatrice) stand up for what they believe in, but also their friends and classmates appear to support them, and surprisingly, even Delinko “sees the light” and switches side. His arc is complete.
• Having Lonna Leep show up at the end to ruin the moment is also perfect for this story which is NOT supposed to be taken TOO seriously.

Chapter 21

In This Chapter

• Roy finds out Mullet’s real name
• Roy is interviewed by an eager reporter and is able to give her some juicy information

Roy’s mother finds out Mullet’s real name in the newspaper the next day: Napoleon Bridger.

The front page has a picture of Roy, Beatrice, ad Mother Paula holding hands at the demonstration with Mullet (or Napoleon) in the background, buried up to his neck.

After the protest, the law officers had returned Mullet to his mom. And a reporter had gotten nearly strangled by Muckle for asking if the pancake house would still be built.

Roy’s mom, meanwhile, plans to make a whole scrapbook with the news clippings, “something to show your children and grandchildren.”

I’d rather show them the owls…if there are any left by then, Roy thinks.

And then a reporter shows up on his doorstep asking to interview Roy. Roy notices the reporter has bluish, finger-sized marks on her neck, similar to the ones Dana left on his own neck, and Roy wonders if this was the reporter Muckle tried to strangle.

(Ha! Funny to bring back that moment here)

The reporter, Kelly Colfax, interviews Roy for a while and then Roy’s father interrupts to give Roy a file — a copy of the permits for the Mother Paula construction.

Turns out that they did not have special permission to harm the owls. Roy gives it to Kelly and tells her to look for the Environmental Impact Statement (E.I.S.). Which isn’t there. The light goes on in Kelly’s eyes and she thanks Roy.

(It’s great that Roy’s dad has a small moment here, supporting Roy in doing the right thing).

Comments & Analysis

Opening: Napoleon? // “Napoleon Bridger.” Roy read the name aloud. // “It’s certainly colorful,” his mother remarked.

Closing: “Don’t thank me,” Roy said under his breath. “Thank my dad.” // Who obviously cared about the owls, too.

OTHER COMMENTS

• Well, we finally get the answer to one of the last, longest-standing mysteries in the book — Mullet’s real name. And that’s a wrap for an excellent adventurous romp with some great lessons for young teens.

Epilogue

In This Chapter

• We find out what happened to all the main and secondary characters after the good guys win the day
• Roy becomes a Florida boy

The Mother Paula story explodes into a full on scandal, and that the E.I.S. was found in a councilman’s bag, along with an envelope with $45,000 cash.

Kimberly Lou Dixon quit her job as Mother Paula, Mother Paula’s stock prices went down, Muckle was demoted to “assistant junior vice-president” and was forced to take an anger management class, and eventually resigned his job to become a cruise director.

The plans for the restaurant were abandoned, film crews interviewed the students of Trace Middle School, Mullet lasted 48 hours in the same house as his mother and then ran away again.

Unfortunately he was swiftly caught and returned and his mother accused him of stealing her jewelry, thus sending him to juvenile detention.

There, Mullet escaped with an “unlikely accomplice” — Dana Matherson. Mullet knew exactly who Dana was, why he was there, and what he had done to Roy, so when “the two young fugitives leaped from the smelly bundle of dirty clothes and made a run for it,” only Dana was caught. He was the “perfect decoy.”

Beatrice knew where Mullet was hiding, but was sworn to secrecy, even from Roy.

The Eberhardts go on a drive, and see Officer Delinko and Curly at the old construction site. They’ve all come to see the owls. As the night falls, the owls show up and Curly says: “I gotta admit, they’re kinda cute.”

 —

After the Mother Paula scandal has died down, Roy goes to watch one of Beatrice’s soccer games, then sneaks away to the Molly Bell, attempting to grab a mullet the way Mullet Fingers did. He fails, but hears a laugh behind him.

“Napoleon Bridger, is that you?” Roy yells, but there is no answer.

When Roy goes to put on his shoes, which he’d taken off to get into the water, he notices one is missing, half submerged in the shallows. The laces have been tied to a root and as he lifts the soggy sneaker, he finds a mullet splashing inside.

Roy lets the mullet go and knows that “the running boy was already gone.”

He thinks to himself he will have to come back and try again until he masters the mullet-catching-with-bare hands trick. Because that’s what a “real Florida boy” would do.

(And we have come to a complete, satisfying circle, finishing Roy’s character arc from feeling like a stranger to belonging to his new home).

Comments & Analysis

Opening: During the following weeks, the Mother Paula’s story mushroomed into a full-blown scandal.

Closing: Guess I’ll have to come back another day and try again, Roy thought. That’s what a real Florida boy would do.

OTHER COMMENTS

• This book eventually became a movie, and the theme song for the movie is called “Good Guys Win” performed by Jimmy Buffett. The chorus lyrics are a bit on the nose, but a good way to summarize one of the main themes for this story:
• “Good guys win every once in a while / Full grown men get to learn from a child / Now and then / Just when you think it won’t happen again / Good guys win.”

FINAL THOUGHTS

Why I Rated This Book 5 Stars

I use this criteria to rate every book (out of 6 points per category):

Star ratings:
1 star = Basically, trash. Or worse.
2 stars = Only worth it if you really like the topic.
3 stars = Average.
4 stars = Quite Good.
5 stars = Worth re-reading more than once.
6 stars = Life-changing.

3. Craft ✍ ✍ ✍ ✍ ✍

Is this work is well-written, and are the ideas clearly and skillfully presented?

This novel weaves together three POVs and storylines — Roy, Delinko, and Curly. One protagonist and two opponents, although one of them ends up being an ally in the end.

The use of humor is skillful, light, and just right. The quirky/zany touches (Beatrice biting Roy’s bike tire, then the ring off her stepmother’s toe, Mullet putting sparkles on the tails of poisonous snakes, Dana being arrested because he stepped in rattraps, etc.) add zest to the story, without being overwhelming.

The pacing speeds and slows down at appropriate times in the story, the weaving of multiple POVs is done skillfully, overall, zero complains with the craftsmanship of this book.

2. Concept 📖📖📖📖📖

Is this an interesting concept, well-executed? (Are implicit and explicit promises paid off?)

LMA/LDB: This is primarily a “love” book, with a touch of adventure and mystery.

It took me a while to decide, but I would have to say this is more of a “love” book than “adventure” or “mystery,” although it has elements of all three, for sure.

Clearly, I’m not talking about romance. The love highlighted in this book is love for friends, family (parents and siblings), and for the community-slash-environment (the owls).

It’s supported by a mild mystery — though it’s not primarily a mystery, because the answer to the mystery is given early in the book, long before the ending (we find out who is sabotaging the construction site, and why).

And there’s also some (very) mild adventure elements to the story, what with Roy being dragged around by Beatrice and Mullet from junkyard to construction site to hospital and so on…but because he doesn’t really go very FAR, it’s not a very strong adventure.

But ultimately the book is not JUST a “love” story or a mystery story or an adventure story.

It’s a ZANY love-mystery-adventure story. And that makes all the difference.

Without Hiaasen’s sense of humor, this story could be pretty forgettable.

But reading about Beatrice chomping on Roy’s bike tire and then her stepmother’s toe ring, Mullet putting alligators in the porta-potty and sparkly-tailed poisonous snakes on the property, and even Roy himself confronting his various bullies and opponents in his somehow amusing no-fuss manner really makes this book what it is.

I had to add a whole entire star just for that. Maybe two.

1. Core ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Are the worldview, themes, and arguments of this work true, edifying, and worth learning?

There’s a clear, strong environmental-preservation message in this book, which I think is great when it’s not unbalanced.

(Unfortunately, there are some people who “love the environment” so much that they put nature above human life and well-being. Hiaasen doesn’t do that in this book, though, which I appreciate).

But more important than that, I love how the relationships in this book are portrayed, specifically the main character’s friendships and the family relationships.

Roy is a really good kid, more than average, but not in a obnoxious, stick-out way. He’s considerate of his parents, instinctively compassionate to a stranger in need (running boy), has a sense of genuine justice that is deeper than just “following the surface rules,” not socially needy but ready to make friends with people who want to be friendly, and able and willing to stand up against bullies — whether it’s Dana, Delinko, or Chuck Muckle.

Roy’s non-ostentatious courage is laudable and a great example for young readers to follow, his kindness and consideration to friends and family as well. And the lesson that when you do the right thing, even if you have to bend the rules a little now and then, you can win — that’s a lesson worth teaching young people and reminding older people.

In fact, perhaps the important theme in this story is the casual corruption that can happen in politics when ordinary citizens turn a blind eye. And the counter-statement when ordinary people DO care to stand up against corruption, sometimes — maybe often times — they can win.

This happens on every scale, local to national, and it’s neat that the author introduces this tale-as-old-as-time concept to kids in a story form that is easy for them to understand.

LED Assessment

How did this book Lighten, Enlighten, or Delight the reader (that would be moi, in this case, since I’m writing this review ^^)?

Overall, this book was extremely delightful, because of its quirkiness. It was also a load-lightening book, because the older you get the easier it is to become cynical and buy too much into the “no good deed goes unpunished” worldview.

It’s refreshing to be reminded of the “good guys win every once in a while” side to life, as well, and this book does it with grace and humor. A solid five stars.

Writing Tips & Practical Application

Because learning doesn’t happen until you change something you do…

• List of quirky character traits: Brainstorm a list of quirky character traits you could give to one or more of the people in your stories. Or start a swipe file!
• Parental involvement?: Think about ways you can incorporate parent characters in a story featuring kids as heroes (without sacrificing the quality of the story, or actively improving it). Or if you’re writing in another genre, what is the least likely character or relationship to be featured in that genre and try to come up with a way to weave that unexpected person or relationship into your story.

Want More Detailed Book Notes?

I’ve curated The Brilliant Writer Reading List to help you find (and learn from) the best of the best books:

Grab your free reading list & join our Merry Band!

This post contains references to products from affiliate partners. Your use of these links helps support Be a Brilliant Writer, at no extra cost to you! To learn more about the BBW affiliate policy, go to : https://beabrilliantwriter.com/affiliate-disclosur